Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Gettiing back on track
Ok......so I must start this first blog by telling everyone that I started out my school career with great success and was very excited about going back to school. I started in February of this year and since then have been invited to join the Honor Society and also named to Kaplan's Dean List. I am very proud of these accomplishments. But then April came and my mom passed away unexpectedly and I find myself in this slump that I cant seem to get out of. Then I got sick and was diagnosed with an infection in my left lung (pluerisy) three months ago that has since developed into walking pnuemonia. I have been going through this period where even taking a shower is too complicated. I know that my depression with my mom's death has had a big impact on my health and I am now doing my best to try and pull myself out. My boyfriend of four years says that I need to start getting back to the things in life that must be taken care of. I know this and I know how unhappy my mom would be if she seen me this way. She was so proud of me when she found out that I was going back to school and I would have loved to have shown her my certificates of achievement. I cant even write about her without crying. Hold. BRB.........Ok..thats better.......So I have decided that instead of using her death as a reason to be depressed, I am going to continuously remind myself how proud she would be of me for what I have accomplished and finish my schooling with the highest grades possible.
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Hi Lisa, Your boyfriend gave you good advice. I can imagine how you must feel though. I lost my brother in July, and I am very close to my mom who I worry is going to go one day soon. I can't even imagine how I would be able to go on when she is gone. I am in the same boat with you for the honors and all so keep up the good work. If you haven't had your Anotomy and phyisology class yet, you're going to need your 100 per cent concentrating brain for that class. I'm struggling with that honors class right now.
ReplyDeleteDoreen
This is a great use for a blog--working through difficult times through writing, processing, clarifying...showing the world (and yourself) your firm resolve to soldier on and make the best of things....healing! I love this. You're doing great.
ReplyDeleteCassie
Hi Lisa, I'm wondering how you are doing with keeping your head up high while still thinking about your mom. Sometimes just out of no where and unexpected I just start thinking about my brother and how I miss him . I'm like you , it usually will bring tears to my eyes and just a depressed feeling Sometimes I'm just starring at my computer in a neutreal state just thinking about him. Then I just snap myself out of it and realize I have to stop thinking about missing him and get back on track. And he is just my brother so my thoughts go out to you knowing you are probably doing the same thing about your mom. I just wanted to offer you some encouragement becauses it also encourages me too. These things just take much time for healing and adjusting. I think we are ok as long as we are able to snap out of it after realizing we must still move forward with out lives and other family members. Time won't change our missing them, but perhaps it will heal our sorrow for missing them??
ReplyDeleteDoreen